Monday, March 3, 2008

separation anxiety

i think I am having separation anxiety from my trainer. I didn't see her from late Thursday and will see her tomorrow, Tuesday morning, and then not until Friday, and for some reason the thought makes me panic. Silly I know,but somehow I feel comfortable with her in working out and looking like a dork. Having a companion while looking like a dork makes all the difference in the world- like you can blame the fact you are looking like a complete freak on her for making you do stuff. Without her, I feel like I am being watched and judged. I know the reality is I am not, but since when do feelings have to be realistic?

So, I need to work on not being so self- conscious but it's not easy. Then I get to the gym and completely forget what to do other than my cardio routine... which is ok but will not build muscle. So, I have to plan somethings out and actually use the information she gives me - i have a workout log that she fills out each session which means technically I can just follow one of the days and have a good workout, but that would mean actually going over to the coed side.

In other news, E got a new job! I am so happy for him- and he will be working days only! Yay for actually seeing my husband every evening. It will be an adjustment but one we are looking forward to.

Just a pic from a scrapbook I am doing on Holly: